We found out last week we are expecting number 2! I am so very I happy with this but you know me, I am worried beyond belief because of the medicines I was on this week and last for the horrible UTI I had last week that ended me up in the ER. I know that it is really early and the baby and I don't share a blood supply for a while but I tend to worry a lot. All of the meds were B and C which are all given to pregnant women all the time! The pharmacist and doctor and multiple nurses and a doctor friend have reassured me that it is perfectly fine and the worry I am doing is likely worse than the meds. I fully know that I am crazy....
My beta numbers were 27 when we checked them last week and my progestorone was 32! When I was pregnant with Tyler it was 37 and only 8 with my miscarriage so I hope that it means this baby is going to stick! We are going to rerun blood work next week and then I will have a viability ultrasound in 3 weeks or so! I can't wait to see that perfect little heartbeat.
It does upset me that I am already starting out this pregnancy in a way I didn't want to. I want this pregnancy to be the opposite of Tyler's which was filled with worry and stress. I want to have a VBAC possibly at home and I really need to be in a positive place to accomplish that!
My mom and Tim are both concerned with the thought of a homebirth so I am going to start getting all my acts together for them so I can make them feel better. My mom made it seem like she would not want to be here anyways so I guess I will call her when I start pushing... I actually do think I may have it just be me and Tim. We can share it together. I think I do want my friend Alyssa here as she had a great homebirth and I would like some moral support and also someone I would feel comfortable taking pictures of everything. And I mean everything!
We are going to meet with the homebirth midwife that delivered my friend Alyssa's baby and also go to the birth center for a tour and to meet with those midwives! I am 99% sure my doctor has no idea that after this ultrasound and final numbers that I plan on leaving and not turning back!
I just hope that I can work with a midwife because I tend to get a little worried and extra crazy and I hope that I can have them be a calming force in this pregnancy and help me to confirm that birth is a normal part of life and not a medical event. It is something my body is supposed to do normally and people have been doing it since the start of time and only in the last 100 years has it been brought into the hospital and more women are dying than most people think. Infections, blood clots from surgery, and the list goes on and on.
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